Wednesday, 28 March 2018

Community? Spread the word.

It seems to me that communities, certainly here in the UK, are few and far between these days, broken apart by revolutions over the last few hundred years. Now we are in the midst of the most recent of these it would appear that we are all the more connected to each other, but these virtual connections are no substitute for the touch of a hand or the sound of mutual laughter, or even mutual grief.

I have an idea, as I’ve already said, to build a virtual community that morphs into actual communities. Loneliness has already reached epidemic proportions and the mental health crisis is effecting all of us in some way. All of this sadness and disconnectedness is buffered by the belief that we are more widely connected, virtually, online, globally. Yet I sit here, alone, and have barely spoken to an actual living soul for the last 3 days. I feel a failure because of this and it stirs in me beliefs that I am unlovable, undeserving and fundamentally bad. I know I am not alone in thinking this way, and I am attempting not to let my thoughts become so dark, but I know what it feels like to lose control of my self-belief and worthiness, and I am not surprised that the suicide rate is rising, that the anti-depressant/anti-anxiety culture is thriving.

So I am reaching out to you, ironically through an online blog, I am hoping that this will be the start of me doing my small bit towards changing the current situation. That through it I may meet people near and far that are of the same mind. That want to connect and communicate with real people, and help others to do the same. We will build an interactive site, right here, that connects people through a variety of mutual interests, and most importantly encourages local connections and meet-ups that begin with an actual handshake, or a hug from another human being. If you are interested in joining me, if you are lonely, if you feel sad, depressed, suicidal, or just plain old dissatisfied with your lot, and the lot of the world as you know it, if you want to change things and/or help change the lives of others email me, comment below, spread the word.

Tuesday, 27 March 2018

What makes you most angry about the world?

Today I am merely posing the above question. I could write a long, long list about what makes me angry, but I rarely show that anger. I guess conditioning has got more of a hold over me than I like to admit. I spend much of my social time, which is much diminished by mental and physical illness over the last few years (more of that later), smiling and saying “I’m OK”, when I am anything but OK. I am angry that we are not encouraged to truly express ourselves, instead we are forced, by parents, teachers, employers, and other authorities to grit our teeth and get on with life. I am angry that this societal norm even exists, and see it as the root of many of my emotional (and physical) problems. I used to be strong-willed and spirited, but the older I get the less able I seem to be to embody these qualities, to say exactly what I mean or am thinking. I bite my tongue and speak the words I believe the world wants to hear, and the world apparently doesn’t want to hear about my many physical ailments, much less about the dark side of my personality that props up the smiling woman I present to that world on a day-to-day basis.

So I am hoping that I am more able to express myself honestly here, and to join with you and others in celebrating our differences and coming together in alliance against the epidemic of increasing loneliness we appear to be in the grip of. So, be honest, what makes you angry? What brings you here? Do you feel lonely much of the time?

You are not alone.

Monday, 26 March 2018

An idea!

My family say I’m full of them. Ideas that is. Well my most recent idea, I’ve been ruminating on for a while now, and this is it. A place where you and I will not feel so alone. A place where you and I can come and find others just like us, those of us that feel alone, or lonely. I’m not talking about solitude, or the choice we sometimes make to spend some time in our own company. I’m talking about loneliness, that we didn’t ask for or expect, that may have just jumped up and hit us in the face or crept up on us slowly over the last few days, weeks, months or years. Whatever, and however, really doesn’t matter that much, the fact is I am alone, I feel lonely most of the time, desperately so at times and ironically I know I’m not alone in feeling lonely. It is a fast developing problem for many of us. It impacts our mental and physical health and wellbeing, and I feel a need to do something about it.
So here goes, what do I have to lose?